About this Blog

This blog started as an online diary and place for me to rant about annoyances in my family.

However since July it has become a place for me to catalogue and express my views and opinions on the treatment I have recieved following the diagnosis of a potentially cancerous tumor in my bowel.

On 3rd August 2011 I was told that it was cancerous. In April 2012 I was given the all clear.

October 15th 2013 I was diagnosed with peritoneal disease and liver metastases. The cancer was back and this time it is inoperable.

It is a little bit out of date as the NHS doesn't tend to have a WiFi connection in hospital and I can only post when I get home and posts take a while to write.

It is NOT about individuals or the nursing profession. It is about some of the inadequacies in the system and the way the NHS is failing some people.

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Tuesday, 24 December 2013

Every cloud has a silver lining.

So, you probably want to know what happened. How I ended up spending 2 more days in hospital and getting yet another ambulance ride.

When I woke up yesterday morning, something wasn't right. I felt wobbly & drunk. I knew something was up, but hoped I'd be able to ride it out. In fact I thought I needed to eat something. My body had different ideas and decided what I needed was to collapse on the floor.

Before this happened I had had the presence of mind to make sure all my children were safe. Isaac and Imogen were eating their breakfast and I has put Hope into her highchair as I definitely did not want to fall on her. 

So I went into my kitchen to make my breakfast and collapsed. I do not know if I blacked out or not, but I can remember sitting on the stairs calling Tony telling him I had collapsed. This is where it gets scary. He told the ambulance crew later that he was not able to understand me. Luckily the children hadn't seen me on the floor. But this definitely worries me.

When he got home he helped me into the living room, then I really wanted something to eat, but my body was still rejecting that idea and as I was trying to make my toast I came over all wobbly again. I was definitely not dizzy. It was definitely more scary than that. Drunk or funny feeling, but not dizzy or light headed. 

So, he got on the phone to 111. They scared me slightly, they were asking me questions I think trying to ascertain whether I had had a stroke. No, I just felt wobbly and drunk. They decided yet again I needed an ambulance and so Tony helped me upstairs where I had another wobble and I waited. 

I'm sorry, Sonya, I was really looking forward to making cinnamon and raisin bread with Jake, Isaac and Imogen. Maybe next year. 

The ambulance arrived and the crew were in no doubt that I needed to be checked out in hospital. Imogen was not happy about this, but I gave her my chemo heart and she accepted that mummy needed to be made better.

So my blood count was 7.2, on Tuesday, before chemo, it was 11. There was something going on.

This time there was some unexplained bleeding, this has been investigated and has cleared up on its own although will need to be monitored. I have had 4 more units of blood and as I mentioned every cloud has a silver lining.

I came into hospital with one red and yellow sock for Hope for Christmas, 4 Father Christmas faces, 8 Father Christmas socks and 4 soles. I am leaving with 2 beautiful scandi inspired socks for Hope and 4 pairs of Father Christmas socks (2 pairs still require soles) and all 4 pairs require the finishing touches.

As well as that I have finished watching Ripper Street, and started my Breaking Bad journey. 

And very soon I shall be heading home for Christmas!!