About this Blog

This blog started as an online diary and place for me to rant about annoyances in my family.

However since July it has become a place for me to catalogue and express my views and opinions on the treatment I have recieved following the diagnosis of a potentially cancerous tumor in my bowel.

On 3rd August 2011 I was told that it was cancerous. In April 2012 I was given the all clear.

October 15th 2013 I was diagnosed with peritoneal disease and liver metastases. The cancer was back and this time it is inoperable.

It is a little bit out of date as the NHS doesn't tend to have a WiFi connection in hospital and I can only post when I get home and posts take a while to write.

It is NOT about individuals or the nursing profession. It is about some of the inadequacies in the system and the way the NHS is failing some people.

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Tuesday, 9 August 2011

One week on - I am turning into my mum and dad!!

OK, so it isn't quite a week but a lot can happen in a week.


Isn't it funny when something happens to you suddenly it is everywhere? More on that later.


Last Thursday we packed Isaac onto a train with my mum and packed Imogen and a lot of stuff into Tony's car and headed west.


Tony loves his car - I hated it. He has a renault megane coupe cabriolet (I think that's right), which although it has back seats actually has no leg room in the back and when you have to fit 2 car seats in the back you need leg room in the back. I always end up sitting with my legs in funny positions which I can normally cope with, however the sitting bolt upright because you can't recline the seat was the worst thing. We got to Fleet services on the M3 and I struggled to get out of the car. That combined with the fact that I am still having mini blackouts when I stand up is not great. So I moved the seat forward and, nasty mummy alert, squashed Imogens legs, by reclining it as much as possible.


We arrived in the West Country about an hour or so after Isaac and mum although I think mum was hoping to have longer to prepare for us. 


Not much happened then, Jo came round after work to see my wound & if I am honest I felt like no one else cared.


I can't write about everything that has happened over the last few days on here not because I don't want too, but because I am aware that this is a public medium and we need to have a balance, which you wouldn't get if I put only my side of the story on here. 


I have done quite a lot over the last few days.


- Met my new niece, who you might recall was born about an hour after I came out of surgery. She is gorgeous, if massive. Huge respect to Becci, who is a foot shorter than me, for having her naturally. She was massive at 10lb 6oz. I do still need to finish her present though. It's nearly there, just I hate the making up part of knitting!!!


 - Done my last third birthday party for a while, Toddlers have so much energy it makes me consider bottling it and appearing on Dragons Den to sell it!! A lovely time was had by all.


 - Walked to the supermarket and back. This was all of a mile in total, but it totally took it out of me


- Realised last night while I was watching iplayer in bed, that I have turned into my mum and dad. Their Monday night viewing consists of University Challenge, Antiques Master, then New Tricks and 10'o'clock News & that was what I watched. I could have gone downstairs and watched it with them, but I am sleeping so appallingly at the moment that I prefer to be upstairs where I can drop off if necessary.


Anyway I mentioned at the top that Bowel Cancer now seems to be everywhere and I shall now explain.


My mum gets Take a Break magazine and I like to flick through them and have a look at what is in there. Flicking through the medical pages low and behold a whole article on a women who had survived bowel cancer, and then all the things you should either do or avoid to reduce your risk of cancer. The list was crap I do (or don't do) most of the things you need to do to reduce your risk and what do I have CANCER.


FYI here are some of the things on the list
- Always use sunscreen. I am incredibly fair skinned and lather factor 30 or higher on me and the kids at the first sight of the sun and very rarely burn
- Loose weight. According to my BMI I am overweight, however I have been my 'ideal weight' and people who see photos of me from that time comment on how ill I looked
- Eat Healthily. As a mum of 2, I cannot feed my kids stuff that I would not eat so although we occasionally will have a take away or a McDonalds, we eat a healthy balanced diet which includes all the major food groups (including Starbucks and Cake). I cannot make the kids eat fruit and veg if I don't & yet Cancer still got me.
- Keep Active. I have 2 toddlers!!!!!
- Stop Smoking, reduce alcohol consumption. OK I smoked when I was at college and when I was drunk at uni and was offered and occasionally at music festivals, but I haven't touched a cigarette at all since 2007. And yeah I used to drink, until I spent several years becoming quite suicidal when I drank and I am a proper occasional drinker. I can clearly remember the last time I was drunk because I tried to walk out in front of a car. It was January 2006. I have a very occasional beer or glass of wine


AND I STILL HAVE CANCER